Hi Friends,

It has been awhile since I have written here, and I thought it is time to get back to writing and keeping this platform updated.

I had high hopes for this year. I set myself up for a huge fall with that way of thinking. Not saying you should not have high hopes as each year starts…but maybe I was too caught up in the fact that I wanted to “will” the pandemic finished and to start fresh.

Oh boy was I in for a shock!

The year started out on a depressing and sad note when my beloved step-dad passed away just before New Year’s Eve. He had been diagnosed with mouth cancer about five months before he passed. When I visited him in September 2022, he was uncomfortable but getting better. He had finished his radiation and albeit, he could not eat much – he was starting to taste things and even requested I cook him some nice “beef mince and rice” on the last evening I was there. I was not able to get back to see him, and put it in my head that he was getting better. Next thing, he was in the hospital and on his way out. I will never forget him, everything he did for me and all the years I visited him in Wellington, West Palm Beach at his peaceful and welcoming home.

He is the reason I studied hotel management, the reason I could make a really good martini, and the reason why I became a “foodie!” – he taught me so much, including the way that humility gets you far.

I realized that the year had not started out very well, and I was in mourning. I tried to get myself back to the gym, and to go out as much as possible as the more I sat around the house on the weekend is the more depressed I became.

Cut to March. I realized that there had been a strange feeling in my right breast for a few months. Not only that, but it was actually seemingly changing shape. I am someone who goes for a mammogram (and ultrasound) almost every year, and the last one in 2022 was normal. There was a lump – but it was apparently “benign.” So if I felt anything I would put it to the back of my head thinking “oh he, the Doctor said not to worry, it is benign, no sign of cancer, stop worrying.” Not only did he say that to me, but he was conducting an ultrasound on a new modern machine when he said it. The report reiterated the same…so off I went, happily living my life.

Until February and then March…when things just did not look or feel “right.” I cannot even put it fully into words, except I know something was wrong!

I went back to the mammogram lab, and jumped past going to the Doctor first, as that would be too time consuming. In my head, I kept reading about more and more young women having breast cancer, so I was not about to ignore certain warnings.

I knew instantly that was there was something not quite right when the mammogram technician started asking me if there was breast cancer in my family. I looked at her like really? She said to sit outside as the Doctor would need to see me and do an ultrasound. My mother was waiting and I said to her, I do not have a good feeling about this. Let’s be prepared.

Lying down on the table getting the ultrasound I was praying hard, but knew something was wrong. The Doctor, a younger one to my regular Mammogram Doctor – said “oh dear, this is something here that does not look right at all.” I immediately sat up and wanted to see it on the large screen. Clearly it really did not look right. I could see the jagged edges around this lump and immediately knew it was cancer. He said what was on my mind “you need a biopsy and fast – let us do it day after tomorrow.” I asked him if they got it wrong the year before. The same lump in the same place. He said NO, this is a new one, I am telling you.

This made me more perplexed. If we are told in our 50’s to do yearly checks, and all was good a year ago, what the hell is this new one? All of these thought went bolting through my head….why…where….what did they miss?

Part two will cover the Biopsy and how I found out I had breast cancer. And what I have done since April 5th when I found out.

Stay healthy!

Much Love,

Neenie